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Shhh…Secret

Hey, psst, over here.  Wanna know a secret?  I’ve got something to tell you, come on over here.  It’ll only take a minute or two….

Here’s the secret.  Your secrets are keeping you down.  They aren’t really protecting you or anyone else.  They are keeping you in the dark.

shhhThe funny thing about secrets is that as you hide them from others, but you also tend to hide them from yourself.  You attempt to pretend they aren’t there.   You try to step over them.  Ironically, one of the secrets then becomes that you are keeping secrets from yourself.

The idea of exposing secrets is fraught with fear.  Mostly we worry about what other people will think, both of us and of our secrets.  We experience shame and embarrassment just thinking about bringing the secret into the light.  I contend that our personal recrimination toward ourselves is far worse than what others would say.  After all, we are hardest on ourselves, aren’t we?

And what’s a major topic of those secrets?  Why, it’s money!  It’s the thing we keep secret even when it’s not necessary.  We have been taught from a very early age not to talk about it.  It’s cloaked and hidden, even when it’s working well in your life.  If it’s not working well it’s not only hidden, it’s well hidden and often hurtful as well.

What are your secrets about money?  Really, what are they?  It’s time to take them out and look at them.  Write them down, start a list.  Give it time.  Remember, you are keeping them secret from yourself.  As you dig for them here are a couple of questions to consider:

          Do you hide money in your house?

          Have you ever stolen something?

          Do you spend money that no one knows about?

          Did you even do something sneaky with money?

          Do you have secret accounts?

          Have you ignored paying back a debt?

          Do you avoid looking at your credit card statements?

          Is there something that happened with money you are afraid to talk about?

All that and more goes on your list.  Write it out.  Tell it to yourself.  Bring it into the light.  Let go of protecting it.  It’s costing you so much to keep it secret.  The cost may be financial, and it is most certainly emotional and physical.

If, after you’ve looked at your money secrets yourself, consider telling someone else about them.  Choose wisely who you tell.  This is not about some sort of humiliation; it’s about clearing out the dark stuff and seeing that as you expose the secrets, others often understand and empathize with you, rather than ridicule you.  After all, they have secrets, too.

Allow me to offer you this.  Send me the secrets.  I know them, I’ve seen them.  I know that just telling them somewhere safe will help you free yourself from them.