Recently I was watching an interview with my friend and colleague, David Darst and he brought up the classic Hollywood actor’s desire: “What I really want to do is direct!” Directing is what we all want to do on some level. Even Barbie wants to direct as exemplified by the “Film Director Barbie”—I know, I was astounded too!
David was talking about how we want to be in the Director’s Chair in our relationships. You know how that works—we want to have everyone do things the way we want them. Of course since our partners want to also direct, such a desire gets pretty messy.
I loved the analogy and started thinking about it on a personal level. For many years my title was Controller, which seems to me to be a money version of Director, so I too like to be ‘in-charge’. I truly think we all do.
And yet, what I notice is that many people think that when it comes to money, they aren’t the Director, Money is. For that to be true Money would have to dictate and direct what is happening, and it doesn’t do that. What it does, as you’ve no doubt heard me say before, is reflect your choices. Using our film analogy, Money is more like the “Director’s Cut” of the film—a reflection of what you the Director created.
So the problem really is, when you think Money is the Director you stop taking charge yourself. You “let” things just happen. You fall into what I call Money Traps, which are basically unconscious spending habits that don’t align with your values and goals.
Remember all those great Mickey Rooney, Judy Garland movies where the ‘kids’ put on a spontaneous musical in the barn? They all had a Director. It was Mickey. He took the role, and coordinated the show.
Without someone directing we end up with chaos, yes? Or at least something unorganized and random!
Managing your money, taking the role of director regarding how you make it, spend it, save it actually isn’t as complicated as Directing all the aspects of an MGM 30’s musical. It has to do with you being clear and purposeful with your money decisions.
If Mickey and Barbie can do it, so can you! How about a major rewrite of the script you are following when it comes to your money? How about making yourself not only the Director but the lead actor? The one who moves the story and action along, instead of the person who is pulled through the plot by circumstances with no control?
This whole thing leads me to a great idea! Why not write up the storyline of you and Money as it has unfolded in your life, and then, just for the fun of it do a re-write of how you’d like it to be?
You really are the Director of your money, so why not own and enjoy that? After all, most of us do really want to direct!
Shell Tain, The Untangler
How about a little help changing your storyline when it comes to money? Give me a call at 503-258-1630 or check out my website at www.sensiblecoaching.com